J, always good for a laugh.....

There is no doubt that J has no filter, and is quite unique in his view of the world. The other day someone (in a professional capacity) asked Shy what her plans for the future were. J pipes in and says how Shy says Justin Bieber is going to be her future husband. And no, he didn't think that "aspiration" was serious, that was why he said it!

The night before I had dinner delivered, which J had to help by opening the door. No biggie there, except he was wearing a princess dress (and no, we don't care about his variety of play, it means nothing, even if it did mean something it means nothing to us.) I guess the delivery guy gave J a funny look because J tells him "worry about yourself, don't worry about me."

Someone told me he will be fine, he will either conform to fit into what other people expect, or he won't conform because he just doesn't care. I have to say, I hope it is the latter. I am glad he is unique and not scared of what others think! I would rather he have the step ahead, because face it, eventually we all reach the point where we live for ourselves, no longer worrying about pleasing everyone else or what they might think of us. I want him to have that step ahead and be himself forever!

The Governor and my oldest

   There are many times I know I am missing out by not being able to follow Day around (some things I am better off not knowing haha.) Last year it was when he spoke to foster parents and social workers at a day long meeting - a friend who attended told me about it. Around that same time he also spoke to social workers, and one texted me that he had her in tears. Today he and his Youth Advisory group meet with our Governor to request change to benefit other foster kids. Many might think it is just a fluff meeting, but these kids do push along change! I have seen many of their requests change policy since Day came to us over 3 years ago!
   Day is nervous, and probably uncomfortable in his suit (but I'm glad to know it is going to good use!) But, as I reminded him, he has already been in the Governor's home for an awards ceremony we attended a few years ago, and met his wife, which we have the photograph from. He is just as much a person like the rest of us. And I have seen him speak to prospective foster parents, so I do know how well he handles himself!
   Even though I can't be there, I am so proud of him!

The by-product of Martin Luther King JR's dream

   Most have heard the "I Have a Dream" speech and others have had the privilege to stand on the spot in front of the Lincoln Memorial where Dr. King spoke those now famous words (I know we have.) But it has not touched the lives of most as it has mine, and that of my family, something which I take for granted most times, but J, at 7 years old, brought it to the forefront thanks to a lesson plan in school.

   Schools can only gloss over our history in the early grades, it's a wonder J even came home with the question as to why he was killed. And while it was oh SO hard to explain to him that sometimes people don't like others based on their skin color, it is also still unavoidable because there are still people out there who feel this way. So while he grasped that "tan and brown" people were kept apart because some felt brown people weren't as good, and some didn't like Dr. King's fight for equality, I was mainly able to bring home the point that if that fight had not been fought, he would not have the siblings that he does, and quite frankly he would not even be here himself.

Because a few people spoke up, it changed our country. While it didn't change who my parents were, neither grew up racist (and as I was a late baby, they were in their 20's during desegregation), so it didn't lead them to raise me that way, it did give me many blessings in the form of my children and my marriage, that I never would have experienced. So, while anyone else out there will still have their own opinions, I know they are the ones missing out on so much, even just one friendship that could enrich their lives beyond their imagination.

Thank you Dr. King, I can't imagine you expected my family as part of your dream, but it is more than I could have dreamed for when I first heard your speech as a child!

 *As a side note, we do not use the colors black and white to describe people, those are the colors of crayons, not people. In reality, we are all different shades of brown anyway.*

from my belly, or my heart

J is at the age where sibling rivalry has kicked in, especially in regards to T. J pronounces quite proudly that he is the only child to come out of my belly. I tell him yes, and he is just as special as my other kids, and while he did grow in my belly, they grew in my heart. T has been quietly listening, and yesterday told me "J came out of your belly mommy, but I came out of your heart."
I can't help but remember the story from my own childhood of a little boy trying to belittle a little girl who was adopted. The retort from the child was her parents chose her, but the other kid's parents were stuck with him.
Hopefully my kids all know each way is as special and valued as the other for entering our family!